Unfinished Business in the Alabama House
Regardless of where you stand politically in Alabama, one thing is certain- the legislature sure did leave a whole mess of unfinished business on its over-stuffed plate before vacating Goat Hill and heading home for the summer. The Republican Supermajority’s genius strategy seemed to be more like taking a bowl of moldy spaghetti and throwing it against the wall to see which rancid noodles would stick. The sad part is that they didn’t seem to have much of a strategy or focus except to fan the flames of the culture war and print off divisive and partisan boilerplate legislation cooked up in some right-wing conspiracy-loving think tank.
In contrast, Alabama Democrats began the session with a well-conceived, detailed, and written agenda based on actual listening sessions with their constituents identifying clear legislative priorities and goals. When they weren’t fending off the goons who were dripping with rhetorical red-meat sauce and partisan cheese hurling rotten spaghetti, Democrats worked hard to pass several key bills that will actually help Alabamians in the short and long term. The putrid spaghetti, by the way, is an appropriate metaphor for voter suppression bills, like the one now signed into law that bans curbside voting for apparently secret reasons only known to MeeMaw and her maker. Their smelly bowl of noodles also included more abortion and gun bills and legislating discrimination against transgender kids.
Somehow, Republicans even managed to make a mockery of the old saying, “The House always wins,” by completely screwing up lottery and gaming legislation. It’s kind of funny considering their political leader, Trump, might be the only person in history to actually go bankrupt owning a casino- we’ll get back to that after we get detailed research from the scholars at Trump University…
Well, that’s not the only super important thing they dropped the ball on this session… Here’s where we insert a punchline without a joke: Prisons.
Yeah, we laughed for a millisecond, too, until we realized how disturbing and horrific the whole situation is in reality.
To be fair, Republicans did an amazing job of ensuring that outstanding bills never got out of committee to see the light of day. They have definitely become masters of gumming up the works and slowing things to a snail’s pace. In fact, they used every parliamentary procedure and rule they could muster to oppose any progressive or generally beneficial legislation and solely because a Democrat had sponsored it.
The point here is that we’ve got a lot of overdue and serious work to do in Alabama, and the Republican Supermajority ain’t doing much of diddly or squat to help Alabama. We have major issues to contend with in healthcare, education, criminal justice reform, voting rights, law enforcement accountability, social justice, and, of course, the economy.
The truth is that Alabama can no longer afford one more moment of Republican incompetence, negligence, or self-dealing partisan cronyism. The Republican Supermajority has had ample time to show Alabama some positive results, and they have failed.
The stats and rankings don’t lie. They’ve had time and opportunity, but they’ve wasted both at the expense of the people of Alabama. Democrats have real solutions to the issues facing our state. Meanwhile, if you will indulge the cliché, Republicans have demonstrated that they are all hat and no cattle- all talk and no action. It’s pathetic, and it’s simply not working… Alabama still hovers near the bottom of every conceivable list.
If you paid attention to the 2021 Alabama House Legislative Session, it’s abundantly clear that we have unfinished business. Republicans have shown time and again that they are incapable of leadership that results in progress- it’s time for Democrats to rise up and clean House.
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